Calling All Angels- Train

Dear Nana,

I have been thinking about you a lot. I have been thinking about your life and my memories of you. I am so sad I didn't get to see you before you left to be with papa. I am glad I was able to tell you how much I love you. 

I want to let you know that I miss you and thank you for all that you gave to our family. You were witty and sharp. You were thoughtful and loving. You loved everyone and let us know it. You made me proud to be a Pingree and I always felt accepted and included in our family. A value that I hold on to, " if we're family, than your invited." Your were our matriarch. Your children loved and respected you and treated you like royalty, the way elders should be treated. 

I am going to write down some of my memories so I won't forget them and my son will know how you influenced who I am and who we are as a family. 

I remember visiting nana and papa in Portland. They had a big yellow house at a fork in the road. they had a giant rock in their front yard. Papa kept the yard beautiful. He had a powder blue truck and camper. Powder blue was his favorite color. Nana had a brown car with a velvety dog in the back window who's head bobbed up and down. They had lots of ceramics in their yard that grandma painted. I remember Gnomes, the 7 dwarves. Inside they had the infamous autumn delight furniture. I was given the love seat in college. They had an upstairs and a basement. They always had a " baby's room" . Nana had various piggy banks that collected quarters and dimes in different tubes. She had a light switch of a flasher, it was funny. She would cook dinner and papa would cook breakfast. Papa would always cook eggo waffles and insist on cutting it in pieces for me even when i was a teenager. Nana liked to smoke and she liked coke. She liked to lay in the sun and they often had a pool in their back yard for this purpose. Nana knit her famous slippers that kept our feet warm all winter long. The slippers are still a part of our family.  Papa did latch hook and paint by numbers. He built me a doll house and we built furniture together, that I still have. Nana liked playing her video games: Pacman by atari. 

I remember laughing a lot with my family. I remember playing games, UNO, spoons and other card games. I remember Christmases together. The bird chirp coming from the christmas tree and i could never find the bird. The ceramic christmas tree with peg lights. Going through big catalogs and circling the toys. I remember and have recipes for nana's Carmels and pickled eggs. I remember the turkey and mayo on rolls and cokes she made us for the long drive home. When I would visit she would often have my favorite candy, jelly belles. I remember the surprise party for nana on her 80th birthday. I have more memories that I need to spend time writing down. These are some of the highlights of how I perceived things. 

Right now, I believe that you are at peace and with papa. I also believe that you are there for me, to hold me when things get rough. I know I can call on you for support and guidance. I don't know where your spirit is but I know you are here for our family.

I see you everyday in my blooming dahlias, the wind blowing the tree leaves, in my dad, in Canyons smile, in my slippers and in my heart. Thank you for creating us. The last time I talked with you nana you said you will keep reading my blog, so this ones for you nana. I love you.