Well I have to say when faced with a life changing surgery I got a 2nd 3rd and 4th opinion. I spent a lot of time getting opinions about my options. When the time came to get the surgery I was confident and ready in my choice to get the surgery. I decided my life was worth the effort and time. I called it operation "save my ass". Well, I am cancer free thanks to the surgery and in 2 days I have my first PET/CT. I really can't imagine there are any cancer cells left in my body. I just believe that I am healed and that the past 2 years are just that, past.
December 11 – 11 Things. What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)
1. cancer 2. bad attitude 3. extra stuff 4. piles 5. extra stress 6. to over worry 7. to rehash old pain 8. pain 9. lack of physical strength 10. to be self-critical 11. anger
Well a lot of these I don't have control over and can't eliminate them completely. I can work on decreasing the possibilities of all of the items. I can eliminate extra stuff. clean house give away and purge. It is always a good feeling. Also more meditation could help with some of the mind garbage.
December 12 – Body Integration. This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present? (Author: Patrick Reynolds)
Well so much of my year has been focused on my body and getting the cancer out of it. I feel like it has been a "mind" journey too. This is a tough one for me because I have fallen out of trust with my body in many ways. I do not know what it can and can't do all the time. I know that I have a strong spirit that lives within this body I have been given in this life and that is beyond my body and mind. When I think about my being I know that is me. I continue to try to respect and give thanks to the body that I have and all the trauma it has endured. I want to reward it and exercise again some day. I want to jog/walk again in a race. No more marathons but just baby steps and see where I can go. You never know what is possible right!
December 13 – Action. When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step? (Author: Scott Belsky)
What is my next step. Not to live scan to scan. I have so much I want to do and experience. I feel in one sense I need to be patient and listen to my body. My mind says lets go lets get this life started lady. The ball is in my court, now I have to initiate. This can be a challenge. I have fear and some self-conscious tendencies but hey why not try. What can I loose? My next step is to invite some ladies over for a game night. My next step is to apply for graduate school. My next step is to go on a 15 minute walk every day. My next step is collage and quilt again. My next step is to take my son to the park.
December 14 – Appreciate. What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it? (Author: Victoria Klein)
I appreciate my life, my family, my son, friends and the time that I have to be me on this planet. I try to tell all thank you and spend time with those I love. I try to be present in as many moments as possible and notice how amazing life is just now. I feel my feelings fully. I try to be gentle and forgiving with myself. I try to be the best that I can be for my family. I also appreciate the laughs I have with my husband and child. No one can make me laugh harder than my hubby. I also like to express gratitude by singing because it feels good and nurtures my spirit. I love to cuddle with my son and feel his warmth and head rest on my shoulder. Thank you life.
December 15 – 5 Minutes. Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010. (Author: Patti Digh)
Canyons first trip to Hawaii. Canyon's first sentences. Canyon's excitement on Christmas morning. Canyon singing songs and dancing a lot. Rocking Canyon in the rocking chair after baths and singing together. His need to tap his knee when it is time to sing thumpity thump thump for frosty. He learned to give hugs and kisses. I finally got rid of the cancer in my body. The strength I had to go through treatment and surgery. The support I received from my friends and family. pushing canyon on the tractor 4 blocks without a problem for me physically. sangha mamas. womens support group. an amazing 900 lights on my christmas tree.
December 16 – Friendship. How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst? (Author: Martha Mihalick)
I lack a little bit in this area. I have to say in general my friends from childhood have been solid and I feel I need to pay more attention to the value of these friends. I did have an "aha" moment when a new friend said that by not sharing who you are, you are cheating yourself of being you. You are not fully healing. This was in a support group situation but I think in general, it is important to be honest and true to yourself is what I gained from this comment. we only have one conscious life right now so why would you short change it? why sabotage it?
December 17 – Lesson Learned. What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward? (Author: Tara Weaver)
I learned that I have a tremendous amount of strength when faced with adversity. I learned the importance for filling my energy stores and not spending it all without refueling on energy. I think I will move forward in a more balanced thoughtful way in my life. I will be more mindful of my choices.
December 18 – Try. What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it? (Author: Kaileen Elise)
I would like to apply for school and go running. I couldn't do those things this past year. Next year I want to play more with friends, go out dancing. I want to build more relationships with friends in my life. I would like to do a 5k.
December 19 – Healing. What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011? (Author: Leonie Allan)
what healed me this year? I am working on it. I have been fighting to heal. It has been a slow as molasis evolution. Mostly friends, family and self searching has brought me healing. I would like to be healed from cancer with clear scans all year. I would like to have my energy back and walk/run a 5k. I would like to emotionally feel at peace. I would like to take a deep breath and relax.
December 20 – Beyond Avoidance. What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?) (Author: Jake Nickell)
initiate more social outings, establish more friendships. trauma won this year. will I do it in 2011. that is the plan.
December 21 – Future Self. Imagine yourself five years from now. What advice would you give your current self for the year ahead? (Bonus: Write a note to yourself 10 years ago. What would you tell your younger self?) (Author: Jenny Blake)
Enjoy it and live it fully, you will make it! Do everything you want to do, start now. Take care of yourself, please be gentle with your soul and find a passion that brings you joy.
December 22 – Travel How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year? (Author: Tara Hunt) {Future Tool: New Year’s Goal Questions for No-Goals Creatives from Jeffrey Davis. For the next 10 days as you round out your year, we’ll share one tool each day to help you [...]
December 23 – New Name Let’s meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why? (Author: Becca Wilcott) {Future tool: Chris Guillebeau’s How to Conduct Your Own Annual Review. For the next 9 days as you round out [...]
I don't know. I don't really care about a new name. I would probably pick a name that is odd or slightly offensive to see the reaction that I may get/push some boundaries.
December 24 Prompt – Everything’s OK What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead? (Author: Kate Inglis) {Future tool: Gwen Bell – How to Create Your Personal Manifesto. For the next 8 days as you [...]
Well the first moment that comes to mind is post- surgery we got all the cancer. moment #2 last thursday at the local mexican restaurant with family- laughing and telling stories. Impromptu ice smashing fun. the word LIGHT comes to mind. For the year ahead- more LIGHT and more LAUGHTER.
December 25 – Photo – a present to yourself Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and [...]
family picture day, December 11th 2010. This was taken the same spot my hubby took a picture of me three years ago when I was pregnant with my little guy. What a road it has been. I see a wiser and confident soul in me. I don't have to prove anything to anyone. It is just me, yup. A little posed but recovered and made it through the trauma and I am still here. Watch out world.
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